Why we can't have kids for love or money

c'moen ppl.. "one for dad, one for mom, one for australia.." (and still all for God =)

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Amateur Poem #280105

as usual, i'm always late for things, (this time toward the in-time submission for the kyc poetry competition, moreover, still breaking the rules for not using the right keywords, 'kyc' and 'relationship'), but nevertheless, i shall keep trying, so here it's if you don't mind reading.. hahha,

[untitled as yet]

so you're looking and still waiting
for something of substance and well-meaning
for none is yet quite fulfilling
and deep down you know it's missing

every turn is there but non-lasting
and you're hungry still in longing
incessantly it keeps you wond'ring
if forevermore it's everlasting

and you keep looking but ever failing
there the journey seems un-ending
the last thing you could do is keep hoping
that someday somewhere it's approaching

friends if i tell you, will you stop searching
and for one thing, you'll try obeying
for answer is there for those listening
if ever like some you'll keep trusting

Jesus came to save those still missing
bringing broken pieces into something
He is offering you a love unfailing
one that's worth giving instead of taking

there then you shall continue holding
onto the one hope and only unswerving
life then will be worth living
imperfect it is, yet keep overflowing...

of the love that we're all longing for...

vyie @ Jan'05

p.s. happy birthday, rose! lurve ya...

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looking for alternatives?

you r living in a world of reality, distorted at some point, and re-invented in many ways, notions that are bound for disillusionment to serve a fallen expectation, other than serving the One true and living God. This is the route to feminism, buckle down, smell the differences and don't panic, glory doesn't need to come in a package of being carefree, powerful, top-job career-wise, (and single!) - Being Julia

also found this blog, somewhat striking, follow if you've time to spare.

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rant # 270105

now, my fingers feel 'itchy' not to tickle keyboard at this very moment.. when no-one is in my cubicle - hAhA! (yep, am in office since 20 mins ago, a lil earlier than usual.. and also, those colleagues tat am talking abt are taking extra days off til next week, so, it'll be quiet here sitting either by myself or with another guy who works from home regularly.. but hey, don't assume tat i'm tat tricky a person, you should get to know others better before making any assumptions on them =)

following the previous post, and btw, more following on these will be a series of a similar strand of issues revolving relationship matters, in essence: people, well, i haven't gotten it over yet from the kyc, let me bore you to the point of 'hating' me for being somewhat dead boring persistent, but can't help myself, fyi, won't promise you to be ever able to see as clearly throughout, sometimes when talking abt an issue, ppl don't always need to use the exact keywords, rather, more than less, things are related nonetheless, so, you'll just have to learn to get used to thinking outside the square you live in, huh, now, before you get on-board, stop thinking tat am somewhat being cryptic or discerning, far from tat, i'm inline to the idea of simplicity, but being simple doesn't necessarily mean being empty-headed or skin-deep, that'll be over simplifying the 'being simple' itself (well, am confused now myself.. if ever any take-away point, i'm far from cryptic or discerning, only a bit entangled in thoughts sometimes, cheers?)

so, in the light of previous post,
- it's good to read. so, grab your book (a Bible is a book as well =) and read, yet, too much of something is never good enough, plus if knowledge doesn't transfer into actions, it hasn't yet reached your heart perhaps, regurgitate it again, head to heart, head to heart. i find it agreable to say that reading good books play rather huge a part in helping ppl to grow. yet, it could also be the opposite, when too much influence is learnt from the wrong books.
- i think it's pathetic when we fail (at some point, all of us do, i guess) to emulate godly characters, and it becomes the norms that drag others even farther away from exercising being godly. a godly model is obviously an open Bible readable for others. as you look around for one, the best place to start is perhaps yourself, everyone has the capacity to change, and it's not too late to change, again, all we need is God's words to point us to the right directions, big homeworks.

for sure, am still struggling with the later point especially (and the first one, when it's out of balance or lack of discipline that either shows or hides into actions as well), perhaps we all need a pad at the back at all times, so don't forget to 'slap' your neighbour face so often (a gentle pad will do =)

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overwhelmed and overcome..

2 words best describe my feelings toward the past kyc 2005,

overwhelmed and overcome:

- at how rich, immersurable God's word is and the fact that it's all that we need to relate to Him as our creator and others surround us whom He creates.
- at how faithful God's word has been preached, thus the overflowing thankfulness for the disciplines of the ministers of God's word.
- at the humble perserverances of God's (ordinary) people in their Christian journeys, reflected through their simple life-style as opposed to greedy consumerism and single-minded Christ-centred passion for life as opposed to ambitious self-centred achieving as they care for others (i.e. sharing their faith and lives in family, work place, mission fields or the ppl they minister to - wherever God has placed them).
- at the wonderful promise of our Lord, Jesus Christ for the life to come, thus shaping the ways we live our present life in the light of eternity.

Nothing more to say (at the moment), need to sink in the things learnt from the talks... helpless as i could, but think it's never meant to be, since above all, Jesus has promised that,

28"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11: 28-30)

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rant # 200105

finally things are more clear cut than they were a couple of days ago.

flatmate may be on the way, tho not 100% sure of that, at least it's good to hear of the possibility. heh, what a lucky person she is! (hAhA!)

kyc is on trow, i'm on the moon =) i need a break, man! ffuiihh..

also, got my working laptop fixed today, logged a service requesting a new mother-board and back casing replacement late yesterday afternoon, since the problem with the soundless speakers seemed to be rooted from the accidental damage that partly broke the mother-board and also causing some cracks on the back casing. very happy, it was damn quick! now i can listen to radio again, which i enjoy doing so while working, sometimes supporting a better concentration for my brain, actually the opposite, just wanting to be entertained with some music, then take me away from reality, a booster for the rest of the hours.

got a letter from deyanira, made my day couple of days ago. she is a 10-year-old chillean girl, who loves his bro very much, enjoy studying, talkactive, responsible, tidy and respectful according to her mom. she enjoys dancing, singing, reading, painting, and playing. she drew me a donald duck last time. poor little deyanira also suffers from a chronic earache. there was a little fuzzy warm feeling inside when i read her letter. i'm a bit dying to reply quickly next week, tho still haven't much ideas of what to write.

rose had been a real company for 3 nights. last nite was super duper draining with talks, talks and more talks! almost a good 4-hour non-stop chatterings. i felt hungry soon after before calling it off a night (gee, am weak! well, she is just rather demanding, u know, hihhi =) nope, u wouldn't have guessed it that when someone has pressed the wrong 'button', i could be a rather dis-harmonised talking machine! rather keen on talking with ppl who are sensible and eager to share as well, most importantly un-snobbish ppl. i'm so helpless on the huffs-and-puffs sorty that are sometimes rather distressing because i'm blank on what to comments to keep them going. sorry.. if i did appear to be cold, keep looking for the button! i'm learning abt you as well =)

don't concentrate well at work today, i shall compensate trow, or next week maybe, being naughty these days.. am hunting for a new cheap mobile phone on the eBay, have yet to learn of some tips before deciding to buy one next week. rya's new feature's phone switch off by itself when others are calling, especially annoying when some special ppl are calling in (i.e. real estate agent who are eager to haunt me for not paying rent fees since two weeks ago, well, j/k, the agent understood what was happening then =).

especially thankful for ppl that God puts on the doorway for me, with willingness and opportunities, i have been well taken care of while i was rather down last week, good on you, ppl! to name a few, andi, sis, rose, lidia, maria, the yaps.. (hiks, huAA..)

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limbo land..

super d.r.a.g.g.y... and sleepy... t.o.d.a.y...

blogging activity has also reached record low so far.. due to the obvious couple of things to mend prior to kyc. the only thing that i'm looking forward to at the moment is this weekend away at Katoomba, having the chance to listen to the talks and getting reminded of God's words again.. yeah, i shall be relaxed, i guess, somewhere in between the hermit-y and hippies personalities (hehhe), so, huffs-and-puffs convos should be banned temporarily as a guard toward slighly high and unexpected health hazards previously, also need some space to save in memory to grind down more obvious stuffs into details, then can let-loose-a-bit... later on, for sure.

work stuffs are slowing down, interested in joining evening class for this semester.

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Psalm 62

For the director of music. For Jeduthun. A psalm of David.

1 My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
2 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

3 How long will you assault a man?
Would all of you throw him down-
this leaning wall, this tottering fence?
4 They fully intend to topple him
from his lofty place;
they take delight in lies.
With their mouths they bless,
but in their hearts they curse.
Selah

5 Find rest, O my soul, in God alone;
my hope comes from him.
6 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.
7 My salvation and my honor depend on God [a] ;
he is my mighty rock, my refuge.
8 Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your hearts to him,
for God is our refuge.
Selah

9 Lowborn men are but a breath,
the highborn are but a lie;
if weighed on a balance, they are nothing;
together they are only a breath.
10 Do not trust in extortion
or take pride in stolen goods;
though your riches increase,
do not set your heart on them.

11 One thing God has spoken,
two things have I heard:
that you, O God, are strong,
12 and that you, O Lord, are loving.
Surely you will reward each person
according to what he has done.

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let's re-start where we left off..

shall we?

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Students develop tsunami warning app

i seem to be more interested in the Konfabulator =)

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Amateur Poem # 110105

way too vast..

underneath the heart of an unsearchable soul,
the echoes of self-awareness unfold
forfeiting a gentle and quiet soul,
only christ-awareness'd unfold

false humility that invests in self-glory
pride that manifests in self-righteous
self-reliant that promotes individuality
self-despair that's beyond cure

impatience that misses the whole point
hold-backs that never reach the point
business that wants to look important
ignorance that wants to enjoy at no cost

selfishness that realises in choices
longings that take to actions
complacency that's foreign of welcoming
insecurity that's foreign of reaching out

negative assumptions that box people in
critical spirit that let others down
hasty words that speak too much
cold silence that ignore too much

confidence that never trust
lack of faith that never try
judgement that compares
ambition that rules

"hey, what's in there for ME?"
"hey, what's wrong with YOU?"
"no, I deserve MORE"
"yes, you worth much MORE"

"whatever is true, whatever is noble,
whatever is right, whatever is pure,
whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable–
if anything is excellent or praiseworthy–think about such things."

vyie @ Jan 05

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God's Love is Life-changing

Sheila Walsh, Laughter For A Woman's Soul, p50.

God's love is a gift that can make you forget yourself at times. The Scottish writer George MacDonald said, "It is the heart that is not yet sure of its God that is afraid to laugh in his presence."

So often with old people and children all sense of what would be appropriate is swallowed up in what feels right. That's refreshing. We waste too many years between childhood and our older years measuring our behaviour on a scale we think we see in someone else's eyes.

God loves us as we are right now! That's one of the things I'm most grateful for. I love the freedom to be myself in God. I pray that a year from now, five years from now, I will be a godlier woman, but I know God won't love me any more than he does right this minute.

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giving more..

i just think this topic is rather sensitive, yet interesting (or may be a bit challenging to point out as well), with regard to the aids, especially financial supports, that many charity organisations, around the world, are pledging people to be generous to help in assisting bringing the reliefs for the victims of tsunami. don't get me wrong, but feel free to agree or disagree, or if you can't be bothered to try digesting them, that's fine. as the news revealed, we've all have heard that people, especially the australians are giving very generously, and in fact, combined with the givings from other countries around the world, the total amount of money collected by the United Nation has reached an amount that would otherwise be achieved in a year, which is 1 billion, yet, this time, all it takes is a week of 'aggressive' encouragement that people show their compassions toward those in crisis.

Here are some facts, loosely re-written:
1) less than a month ago, an article in SMH was reading that some portions of the charity sum that people donated are being kept by the organisations. this can be understood as far as covering for the cost of operations. however, indeed, some charities set their own policies with regard to how much of the amount collected will be channeled back toward the needy people. worse still, they have certain amount of time (or years), that would allow them to not channel back the closest whole percentage being collected.
2) World Vision's CEO - Tim Costello, having understood that the tsunami crisis is such devastating, changed the organisation's policy with regard to receiving the donation from gambling proceedings, the Clubs NSW ($500,000), which was refused at first, but later losing it since it has been donated to CARE Australia and Catholic charity, Youth Off the Streets, once being rejected. clearly, the policy is set to tackle issue that can arised based on ethical grounds if such donations come from rather 'unethical' sources. hey?
3) For short term relief, the massive amount collected is more than enough to do what could be done to help the victims, the rest of the amount, well, you don't know how they are being managed.
4) Quite a few web-sites are defrauding people's money (and trust) by deceiving that they are associated with certain registered charity organisations, so donations could be made through them.

Obviously:
you should be as generous in giving, we are only stewards of what God has entrusted us, and keep on challenging yourself to give more.

Perhaps:
- you should just be more careful in giving to any charity organisations, i.e. registered, clear stand on amount being channeled back toward the needy.
- not only perhaps, but do pray for those ppl managing the money, since greeds can consume anyone without mercy, you are talking about millions (or billions this time).
- don't be naived to donate online through some doggy seemingly-with-authority cash cows (or cowards should i say).
- what's better is if charity can lead to opportunity for Gospel to reach out to people, so, check out for organisations whose aim is to facilitate meeting the greatest need of people though the compassions shown.

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The Ten Commandments (+1)

Or let me revise, the Ten (non-exhaustive) Commandments (+1) of 2005. God willing.

1. More trust.
2. More disciplines in studying God’s word and being prayerful.
3. More supports for family (and friends, if can afford sincerely =).
4. Carpe diem.
5. Don’t shine, don’t whine, don’t recline.
6. Never deprive a good night sleep, regular exercises and healthy diets.
7. Be more environmentally friendly.
8. Don’t neglect to bother not reading.
9. Nurturing one passion (either writing, photography, learning guitar).
10. Learning to talk more efficiently.
11. See #1

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note to self # 030104

And so today marks the last day of the holiday period and exactly tomorrow, the cycle of another year of life, work routine will start, and every day is as good as they are ordained by God, who doesn’t withhold any goodness from us, for He sees the big picture. So, a note to myself, purge the melancholy boredom hormone inside, if it ever creeps me, pray that God will take it away, and celebrate the day that God has given, to fulfill my call as one whom Christ has saved, my role.

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BBQ - Coogee Beach

Around 25+ ppl were joining the bbq. It was a pretty relaxing one, and everyone seems to have a good time. The sense of belonging of this bunch of people is the least thing you want to take for granted, since quantity-wise, mostly everyone in Pemuda is what you can expect to meet on most occasions, and gatherings. Far better is the hope that God will bring their faiths into maturity in Christ as they serve one another by firstly being faithful to Him, and one another. The joy of knowing Christ before the joy of being part of the fellowship, or least I say having funs together.

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All about hairs..

Quite happy with the haircut, since it leaves me with a rather loose feeling of having shorter hairs, easier to manage as well. The hairdresser was quite meticulous, outcome’s proven to be heaps better compared to last haircut five month ago, tho quite short this time. It won’t take long to grow within months, legs’ have always been giving me a hard time to keep shaving them =)

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contemplating a career.. hmn

don't worry, am not that pissed off.. not yet, it's only an acclamation =)
nor is it a repressive kind of expression, huh, when is repression an expression?!?
damn, just laugh it off, since i don't understand as well.. (hAhA!)

a chick has got to dream a dream somehow.. to sleep things off, so, here it is.

if only i could choose what i want to be, and thing does happen, what do you want me to be?
i mean.. what would i love to be? thinking.. thinking.. perhaps.. a low-profile freelance artist who could support myself and loved ones through my creativity in these few areas: writings, photography, musics, plus a singer as well, or.. maybe a social worker who's also a psychologist, and happened to be pet lovers as well, kids.. yes kids before pets, then ordinary people like me (haven't identified myself with these yet so far, who knows, only some wish lists, it's a new year, right!?!).. and a christian as well! whatever i'm..

happy new year, peeps.. wish you well next year, God loves you.. and so do i =)
(from the bottom of my heart, as long as you don't piss me off! you promised me..)

ok, stop it! admit i didn't get enough sleep last nite, it was 3 am when i got home..

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amateur poem #010105

the interpretation..

it's not big a thing, but it's not nothing
only as much as an acclaim
yet ask me not why
for life ain't so simple

when i wanna talk, i say
when i wanna hold, i keep
but what does it matter
if i learn only to express

when it passed you by, it's life
tho others may understand not
yet that's all that matters
when a thing has been learnt

yet so many times
things are better laughed off
leave alone trying to grasp
an understanding that yields nowhere

so laugh with me..
yes, let's laugh together..

vyie @ Jan'05

ps. tis is only a flip half-an-hour poem, not much thoughts are put into it, therefore, some 'doctrines' inside maybe flawed, nonetheless they are honest, and therefore it is.

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