once upon a time..
i'm pissed off..
...
...
maybe i should just shut-up!
Friday, December 31, 2004
Thursday, December 30, 2004
Waves of destruction wash away belief in God's benevolence
confused opinion of a philospher?
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
Yet Another Day – surviving..
Of the holiday period, a quiet one today, but love it nevertheless, since the past four days have been spent on going and eating outs with tri and the company. So, today is a day of resting from all the unordinary business of the past days. Where do these all leave me? Broke, tired physically and alone (tri is no longer occupying me in both positive and negative ways, staying together vs. living alone, lessening the burden of paying rent fees vs. going outs, sharing responsibility in daily chores vs. all labors of cleaning by myself, like yesterday’s one, home sweet home, surely tiring) yet also feeling content, serenity, and thanking God for her company and this quiet day (like today, and many more days, hopefully not too many, until another flat mate or temporary occupants during these holiday periods) where I can spend some time to write and relax a bit. So, some flash back revisited..
Before that, also, felt sorry for the distressing natural catastrophic happening in the South East Asia that has claimed 70,000+ victims so far. Hometown near Medan was also affected by the massive earthquake with its epicenter the closest to the province of Aceh, which is only next to North Sumatra. May the Lord Himself comfort those experiencing the sorrowful lost of their loved ones, and bring relief toward the helpless through the generosity of people in anyway helps can be provided.
Tuesday, December 28, 2004
rant # 281204
Tri Left For Good – all the best..
Sent her to the airport. Tri had stayed with me for the last nine months. And it’s time for her to be back for good yesterday having finished her study in the capacity of a scholarship student. Therefore, the daily ignorance due to study occupation during the semester is not a surprising fact, yet her company had also been a memorable one in the history of flat-mating so far. Due to her dominating pragmatic way of life, as matter-of-fact, this had taught me in term of being less fuzzy with nitty-gritty stuffs that I could sometimes have the tendency to be dragged into or absorbed by daily. Other less obvious ones include, her dedication to keep things clean inside the house (since it’s me that she has to deal with if the opposite =), the bothering, small chats that she brought into while I was attending to the news on the teli, preventing me from looking alike one who suffers the autism, her the-heck-with-what-others-think-of-you blissful thoughts, in a positive way, let not others who don’t deserve to define your basic rights to be yourself rob you of your decent freedom, her sometime adventurous and dare-to-experience the unordinary in life, are no-where to be experienced unless the Maker of Life, gives you the privilege to share your life with others surround you.
Monday, December 27, 2004
rant # 271204
Hatta’s Fish – feeling healthy..
The sixth time being treated with his freshly-caught fish. This time for the occasion of last dinner’s with tri. The day before, hatta was catching around 40 pieces of fish altogether! How I wish to be spoilt with fish daily, obviously love fish more than meats.
Phantom of the Opera – superb!!!
This movie has been my favorite one throughout the year, judging by its popularity as a famous renowned musical classical opera by Andrew Lloyd-Webber, I promised myself to watch it in the cinema, and I did finally on its first day screening on Boxing Day! Read the rest at your own expense, but I just love the story line – where the complex mixed feelings of a very ordinary human’s experiences of unhealthy jealousy, possessiveness, misunderstood intelligence, arrogance, and mischievous evil intents involved meet the lessons of love and forgiveness. You could feel the emotions portrayed creeping into your heart beats, if you are as sensitive as me. Also the grandeur of the props, outfits, the opera background, combined with the finest pictures of the breathtaking snowy backdrops, the very soft tone colors of the white, blue and blackish grey sky, minus the grimy dungeon behind what is a grand opera theatre have been both bracing and serene yet frosty, leaving you in a two-states of far from dreary experience. The castings are very much fine, simply because you won’t find famous names whose career-wise in film industry would have left you with some bigotry pre-occupation marks of certain casts, simply unfit to be involved in a renowned giant classical like this. The story ends with a mixture of sadness, happy-ending, and mysterious no-one-have-guessed-it-yet endings, left me in awe of the author’s creativity, very interesting. Nonetheless, it’s not a movie for everyone because of its musical nature.
Boxing Day Sale Frenzy – boring, just wondering..
What it’s been like this year, a huge sales record for retailers, yet also a big win for freak’n shoppers, though a bit less crowded compared to last year’s, having been a day delayed because of the public holiday falls on the weekend. And you’ve guessed it right; I don’t shop very often, very rarely in fact. It wouldn’t have been an exciting one to follow the story of a no-experience-what-so-ever-shopping-hater like me. In fact, one of the resolutions for next year is being more environmentally friendly, save the environment; go slow on materialism and consumerism, recycling wherever possible. Many times, I’m left to confusion on how to make use of the many stuffs (not that it’s very much more than yours, I believe it’s much less already) at my place, rather than just piling them up more and forgetting them altogether, thus never utilizing them, hopefully won’t be too lazy to sort them out to give away next year. The principle stays still, save the best for the right ones perhaps, since everyday luxury will rob your excitement away even when you deserve to enjoy one. Obviously, it’s far from saying that one should deprive himself of every goodness that life can offer, rather, if being luxury means being overly, excessive self-indulgent, selfish, uncaring, lousy spender, well, it’s not a stingy thing to challenge yourself to go slow, perhaps others are in need more than you.
Sunday, December 26, 2004
rant # 261204
Wollongong – love it!
For the beaches: W’gong, Lake Illawara, 2 more beaches in between to Kiama (for the blow hole). Sight-seeing plus chances to take more photos, what an indulgence! Walk and more walk, it’s the Master of creativity plus the array of His masterpieces, the priceless enjoyment that I can’t afford to ignore and not falling in love with.
Also being visited is the Nan Tien Temple, smoky =)
Saturday, December 25, 2004
Christmas Day – whose birth is it?
(a song by Cathy Sampson 2003, CD: Stand Firm - Cathy Sampson)
KING OF KINGS
Isaiah 7,9; Matt 1:23; Luke 1:30-33, 67-69; Phil 2:6-11; Col 1:15-20; Rev 15:3-4; 19:1-8, 15-16
1 For unto us a Son is given
On earth His reign will bring release
Fullness of God, this child in earth and heaven
Guides our feet into the path of peace
CHORUS:
He is the King of Kings
The Lord of Lords
The mighty Prince of Peace
He is the Lamb of God
Emmanuel
The Holy One of God
2 Here is born in David’s town
To you a Saviour, Christ on earth
On royal throne, God’s righteous Son is crowned
Our salvation comes in lowly birth
3 Humble obedience shown in death
As on the Cross He won our peace
God raised His Son, now all will bend their knee
On that day when all our sorrows cease
4 As with the angles we can cry
Great are your deeds, your ways are just
Power and glory to the Lord on high
King of all the Ages, God with us
Friday, December 24, 2004
rant # 241204
Warringah Mall – nice design..
For a shopping mall, the most sunshine and outdoor feelings you can get inside a shopping mall compared to other malls.
Palm Beach – my first ever summer sun-burnt for the season..
Combined with the western beaches journey, the burns have leave temporary scars on my face, reddish turning brownish flaky skin, it’s also rather painful! Long beautiful coastal line surrounded by pricy holiday hide-away homes for the famous wealthy.
Thursday, December 23, 2004
Tuesday, December 21, 2004
Sunday, December 19, 2004
Friday, December 17, 2004
my mind's playing a trick on me
know it!
last nite didn't have my proper dinner, but snacked on small things enough to make me survived, wasn't feeling full, while not hungry as well, still felt like eating properly, but knew that was more than O.K. so to compensate, had a big one for lunch, feel really full until now.
rant #171204
reading speed's accelerating.. eventho won't be permanently, the less you read, the more screwed up it becomes.. no more snail phase (yeah.. never ever come back again.. can't affort, no.. at least not now.. the urge to read is massive). unfortunately, my eyes don't appear to look as fresh, due to excessive usage.
flatmates.. where art thou..??
Thursday, December 16, 2004
counting down
it's an early christmas pressie from workplace, a box of chocolate, that i haven't unwrapped, forgot, until tis morning, still unwrapped, but knew it since yesterday, a colleague's unwrapped it. 10 more days before a 10-days holiday period from 24.12.04 to 04.01.05, counting down.
tis' our legacy, let's keep it rolling..
funny dream last nite, but won't make too much of sense to tell anyway, made me laugh a bit when woke up, hmn, brain's sometimes one mysterious unknown the way it works (obviously speaking from a normal person point of view, no knowledge of psych. presumed, ugly, always spell it wrongly the first time, traumatized.. or paranoid?)
also didn't get enough sleep, due to late nite after chats for pemuda's next year's plans finished around 11 pm, but things seem to progress. the rest is all about getting ppl to be continually excited on working on it for the longer going. it obviously is encouraging as ppl r having the same mind to look forward, change's inevitable, n hopefully all want to be part of the change. be excited about it, it's contagious! (yes u know what am talking about) n keep praying. more 'blah-s' in emails per things discussed, n never be tiring of meetings to blend all intangible thoughts into a concrite move forward. a special note to all bs leaders n coming inti generation: love u all!
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
Living Your Theology
(Taken from Oswald Chambers' My Utmost For His Highest)
Walk while you have the light, lest darkness overtake you . . . —John 12:35
Beware of not acting upon what you see in your moments on the mountaintop with God. If you do not obey the light, it will turn into darkness. "If therefore the light that is in you is darkness, how great is that darkness!" ( Matthew 6:23 ). The moment you forsake the matter of sanctification or neglect anything else on which God has given you His light, your spiritual life begins to disintegrate within you. Continually bring the truth out into your real life, working it out into every area, or else even the light that you possess will itself prove to be a curse.
The most difficult person to deal with is the one who has the prideful self-satisfaction of a past experience, but is not working that experience out in his everyday life. If you say you are sanctified, show it. The experience must be so genuine that it shows in your life. Beware of any belief that makes you self-indulgent or self-gratifying; that belief came from the pit of hell itself, regardless of how beautiful it may sound.
Your theology must work itself out, exhibiting itself in your most common everyday relationships. Our Lord said, ". . . unless your righteousness exceeds the righteousness of the scribes and Pharisees, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven" ( Matthew 5:20 ). In other words, you must be more moral than the most moral person you know. You may know all about the doctrine of sanctification, but are you working it out in the everyday issues of your life? Every detail of your life, whether physical, moral, or spiritual, is to be judged and measured by the standard of the atonement by the Cross of Christ.
Monday, December 13, 2004
on fri nite was gathering with some others at imen's, shared a bit re the unexpected happening to him a couple days ago. he was thankful for no such coincidence turned out tat through some friends, help was on the way for him. can especially see his sincerity while also sharing at pemuda on sat, but on the nite while gathering with us, he was pretty much in a 'slank' mode the way he sometimes joked plus tried to be truthful in sharing his story. tis wasn't the point, to bring to a certain extend, the fact tat God does look after us might not be surprising, yet again and again can turn out to be so amazing under flip circumstances, and beyond our normal course of thinking. previous was the main point, the rest might be another line of thought, a bit bothered with the way ppl joked out of the train of the convos, which i think is unnecessary, not tat am such a freak'n stressful serious sort of person who doesn't have any sense of humour, (in fact i almost appreciate every good joke if it deserve to be), but turned out tat some of them are way too sick to be jolly merry cheerful about, can't help, but annoyed.
sorry for being dry tis time, perhaps i deserve to be forgiven as much as you do.
Friday, December 10, 2004
little branching here
working on .NET project (C#), starts small, doing the CSS, since the Actuate report writing is a bit loose at the moment, waiting for feedbacks for written reports. basicly, waiting for new specs. filling the gap, learning new stuff, looking forward.
Monday, December 06, 2004
monday morning
another week, meant to be late nites tis week.
tonite will be meeting with pemuda, trow another appointment with doctor to pick up the results, and the following nite, accompanying tri for her early graduation ceremony, this
chick is very keen on booking me for a photo session surrounding sydney's landmarks with her
graduation gown. don't wanna be disappointing, got to grasp a bit of understanding on taking
nite pics =)
looking forward to next year's kyc, got slightly more people joining than last year's. also the
services for pemuda will be re-located to the 'new' (let's use the term, tho it's not a new building, nevertheless the moving is unusual, once in lifetime for me so far) church in
kingsford (hurrah! closer to place, walking distance, no reason to turn up late =). heard
from andy tat it's ready to be occupied, pemuda might be moving as early as jan.
hA! too many stuffs to be excited about. thanks God for his provisions.
Sunday, December 05, 2004
"Those on the rock are the ones who receive the word with joy when they hear it, but they have no root. They believe for a while, but in the time of testing they fall away."
"..pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was upon him, .."
"those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint"
Friday, December 03, 2004
thou shalt
not spoilt thy brain cells with empty shallowness
not deprive thy brain cells of the joy of reading
make time to read..
make time to read..
not only dive into own world
so much so to promote a hermit-style personality
make time to spend with others..
make time to spend with others..
not be short-sighted
nor too ambitious about life
have a vision..
have a vision..
remember tat
God is bringing your faith into completion..
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
season greetings
currenlty listening to traditional christmas songs in launchcast while working. it revives the early christmas season feeling (mmn.. suddenly tis peaceful fuzzy warm feeling inside..)
had just been back from team meeting for development group (sdg = sunsystem dev. group, the term exists here). good to be able to hear updates from people with regard to the past two weeks happenings in their lives (personal and work stuffs).
tomorrow will be the christmas cruise (vessel on sydney harbour) departing from the lavender bay wharf (close to luna park perhaps).
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