i found myself reading again the pursuit of holiness by jerry bridges. it was four years ago when i first read it. i've ever rarely read a same book twice, simply because there are so many good books out there that vie for your attention. i think i pick this book again mostly because it helps to remind me that without holiness, no one will see God (hebrews 12:14). i'm fooling myself in thinking that my walk is as smooth as long as i read the bible, pray, and fellowship while all the more i fail to put God's word into practice, to surrender to God whole-heartedly and to be accountable in my walk with a fellow believer. i'm reminded that the pursuit of holiness is God's providence but human's responsibility at the same time.
this time however, i'm stunned by a particular chapter that speaks volume to what i'm going through recently and the intricateness that comes from being in a part of a fellowship of saints but sinners at the same time. i'm quoting somewhat long chunks and several of them.
Bitterness toward people is the result of an unforgiving spirit.
Someone has wronged us, either apparently or actually, and we refuse to forgive
that person. Instead we harbor thoughts of bitterness toward the person. We
refuse to forgive because we will not recognize that God has forgiven us of far,
far greater wrongs. We are like the servant who, having just been forgiven a
debt of several million dollars, had a fellow servant thrown into a prison over
a debt of a few dollars (Matthew 18:21-35).
Closely akin to bitterness is the spirit of retaliation. When we
are wronged, the tendency is to retaliate - often in our minds if not in
actions.
...
Paul wrote, "Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's
wrath, for it is written: "It is Mine to avenge, I will repay," says the Lord"
(Romans 12:19). Peter said of our Lord, "When they hurled their insults at Him,
He did not retaliate; when He suffered, He made no threats. Instead, He
entrusted Himself to Him who judges justly" (1 Peter 2:23).
...
One of the most difficult defilements of spirit to deal with is the critical spirit. A critical spirit has its root in pride. Because of
the "plank" of pride in our own eye we are not capable of dealing with the
"speck" of need in someone else. We are often like the Pharisee who, completely
unconcious of his own need, prayed, "God, I thank you that I am not like all
other men" (Luke 18:11). We are quick to see - and to speak of - the faults of
others, but slow to see our own needs. How sweetly we relish the opportunity to
speak critically of someone else - even when we are unsure of our facts. We
forget that "one who spreads strife among brothers" by criticizing one to
another is one of the "six things which the Lord hates" (Proverbs
6:16-19).
All of these attitudes defile us and keep us from being holy before God.
They are just as evil as immorality, drunkenness, and debauchery. Therefore, we
must work diligently at rooting out these sinful attitudes from our minds. Often
we are not even aware our attitudes are sinful. We cloak these defiling thoughts
under the guise of justice and righteous indignation. But we need to pray daily
for humility and honesty to see these sinful attitudes for what they really are,
and then for grace and discipline to root them out of our minds and replace them
with thoughts pleasing to God.
ps. i've always wanted to read john chapman's
a sinner guide to holiness. i bought one a year ago, but ended up giving it away. i'm thinking this will be next on the menu. a colleague at work also lends me a fiction, one of the same author of
sophie's world. i rarely read fiction, i think variation will be an excitement this time.
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