Sunday, July 31, 2005

a note to myself - discipleship101

(from retreat plus personal reflections)

i'd always like to think of discipleship as a timeless theme, and because of that the discovery part is almost un-ending. i'd have been a Cn for sometime, and yet there'll never be a point where the necessity for learning and be taught by God's word (and others) is going to due anytime soon, and the -ship in discipleship said it all, it's a (confirmed) state in being, all the more important since it's Christ's blood that has first washed clean a sinful person like me and onwards the imitating part has to follow as a natural course. therefore the reason for discipleship, christ-likeness..

(and mind you, i have to prepare for tomorrow's battle and was rebuked by God's word through the sermon during pemuda on the importance of meditating on God's word daily.., not just reading it.., still a hard necessity that hits hard my lame brain power! desire is the keyword obviously, not the l.a.m.e b.r.a.i.n po..we.r though, do pray for me..)

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Wednesday, July 27, 2005

i kinda suffer from incompetence posting syndrome due to my lame brain power. i'd easily remember nitty-gritty stuffs (and keep catching up the phase as they come along), and by the end of the day i'd fail to post things that i'd really really like to sit down and write about.

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Tuesday, July 26, 2005

there are 11 types of people who understand binary, one who does and the other who doesn't.

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Friday, July 22, 2005

I found this piece from a book that i'm reading recently, a simple one, yet a firm expression of the author's contentment in God, a discipline that exhibits itself in constant and continual amazement of an all powerful God. Thus, it matters not that one should own too less or much by human standards (she happened to be a poor lady), he is to be utterly contend with the fact that God created him to enjoy all His goodness in creations.

[Untitled]
[Anonymous] - A Poor Methodist Woman

I do not know
when I have had happier times
in my soul
than when I have been sitting at work,
with nothing and a white cloth,
and hearing no sound
but that of my own breath;
with God in my soul
and heaven in my eye.
I rejoice in being exactly what I am
-a creature capable of loving God,
and who, as long as God lives,
must be happy.
I get up
and look a while out the window.
I gaze at the moon and stars,
the work of an Almighty Hand.
I think of the grandeur of the universe
and then sit down
and think myself
one of the happiest
beings in it

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Thursday, July 21, 2005

don't think i'm doing alright at work today, can't really concentrate, feeling sick sitting in front of the computer. i might work from home tomorrow. it's a combination of pains around head, neck, and chest, eyes are heavy as well.. appearance wise, i don't look very sick, only tired.. feeling very lazy.. i'd better leave..

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Wednesday, July 20, 2005

did i say that i was about to be sick? i guess i need to take a short leave, after a while of working, i need to recharge. and so, when i found out the park yesterday, i was excited, being able to listen to children's screaming toward the games that they play, birds' chirping, breathing the fresh air, looking as far the beautiful scenery ahead, and just walk till i drop! all these are simply blissful, having to compare with 9to5 office hours. once in a while, am wondering that i still hang on to all those craps that life has to offer (i mean, sometime i still see a glass half-empty, only when the wrong button is pushed, forgive about the pessimism!).

i'm taking a day off today, doing some things that i consider therapeutic, so i could once again and always, see a glass as half-full ;)

  • taking a longer warm bath (water crisis is no fun at all!)
  • having quiet time to read (just anything that i'm keen on reading)
  • doing an exercise/getting gentle massages (manage to un-locate bro's CPU among other stuffs, need to have it sent overseas, enough for a day's exercise!)
  • getting enough sleep/appetising my taste buds (eating not for the sake of eating, rather enjoying it and the taste that gives temporal fulfilment)
  • looking after personal hygiene related (cutting my nails n bedroom sanitizing)
i thought i'm gonna say something about the retreat last weekend, believe it to be therapeutic as well to be reminded of God's word and spending for days with others.

halfly recovered by now.. i hope it's ok to be back to work trow..

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Tuesday, July 19, 2005

i'm feeling sick, wondering whether should go to work trow. have less than urgent stuffs to get done for the week, apart from self-learning lately. found a park today, in the middle of north sydney area, not far from office, should walk there more in the future.

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Friday, July 08, 2005


[untitled]

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something abt being straight

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the rocky coastal line

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or the best of pals

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all by yourself

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in group

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many come to fish

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featuring the serenity and transquility of the place

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shoalhaven, south-west of sydney

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"not much, i guess.."

i was slow (and insensitive apparently).

so the big boss came across the kitchen around lunch time to get his few-who-knows-how-many-already-th cup of coffee, and i was about to heat my lunch in microwave. being the open-minded, approachable gentleman he is, so he asked "so, what do you have for the weekends, hanvy?" i'm not really planning anything particular for the weekends, and being the unspontaneous person i'm who are slow to create much needed quick answers in my mind most of the time (a.k.a think-talk-think type rather than talk-think-talk), i gave a simply simplistic reply, which doesn't help much, "not much, i guess".

for five seconds, i was thinking that i'd say, "oh, i have bible study on saturday followed by youths.", but i didn't, thus the (too) simplistic reply! i threw the question back, wondering if he had any plans already, and knew that it's going to be his son birthday party on sunday.

need more God-talks! who knows where they lead..

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a world of chaos

the first thing i checked in smh this morning is the picture gallery section that depicts the london's blast, not the news themselves. people are hurted, and faces don't tell a lie in situation like this, the feeling of shocked, terrified, bewildered, perhaps anger, seem to be valid responses toward what's happened. and as i moved on to have a peek at the video footages, i had expected the same tensions that people have suffered from. the spiritual forces of evil is a constant battle that would draw some closer and others further away toward an acknowledgement of the existence of God.

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Wednesday, July 06, 2005

yesterday, it took me more than two hours to reach home since there was a truck for landcove tunnel project sled down the road toward a much lower end, not sure what really happened then. lucky for me bringing a book to get myself occupied, but it was dead boring sitting inside a creeping bus with a whole load of commuters stuck in the traffic jam. what a journey!

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podcasting

is a term recently considered as the new generation of radio where you can easily tune-in the growing sources of audio just like listening to the radio from your desktop (and if you are priviledge enough to own an iPod, then you can sync it and voila it becomes commutable). the other side of the coin is that you are not only able to listen, you can even make your own radio station. all that's needed is the software from Apple, the iTunes (freely downloadable here) to help you easily manage the podcasts (and sync-in with iPod later on). if you are familiar with audio-blogging, i'd reckon they are pretty much the same thing, but perhaps the audio-streaming in audio-blogging (never try that though) could be sluggish where you have to wait for the stream-files to be downloaded by pieces.

many have started taking advantages of podcasting (the laws to regulate the copyrights issue of podcasting materials is yet on the way, so be careful there may be nasty sources that are illegal as well). one example is some churches are starting to post their sermons in the mp3 files format by way of podcasting.

once you started to build your own libraries, you can rss-fed the audio topics to your desktop, exactly the text style rss-fed. just by googling, you would get many podcasting sites to suit your interests (or choosing your favourite stations).

moreover, you can ramble to your liking (and bored people out of their couch).

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Sunday, July 03, 2005

Where Is the Love?

If you happened to know Black Eyed Peas, here is one piece of their songs. The lyrics are meaningful, far from superficiality. I have regards for those who know just how to create beautiful lines like below.

What's wrong with the world mama?
People living like aint got no mamas
I think the whole worlds addicted to the drama
Only attracted to the things that bring you trauma
Overseas yeah we tryin to stop terrorism
But we still got terrorists here livin
In the USA the big CIA the Bloodz and the Crips and the KKK
But if you only have love for your own race
Then you only leave space to discriminate
And to discriminate only generates hate
And if you hatin you're bound to get irate
Yeah madness is what you demonstrate
And that's exactly how anger works and operates
You gotta have love just to set it straight
Take control of your mind and meditate
Let your soul gravitate to the love y'all

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can you practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father Father Father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?(where is the lovex3)(the love2x)

It just ain't the same all ways have changed
New days are strange is the world the insane?
If love and peace so strong
Why are there pieces of love that don't belong
Nations dropping bombs
Chemical gases filling lungs of little ones
With ongoing suffering
As the youth die young
So ask yourself is the loving really strong?
So I can ask myself really what is going wrong
With this world that we living in
People keep on giving in
Makin wrong decisions
Only visions of them livin and
Not respecting each other
Deny thy brother
The wars' going on but the reasons' undercover
The truth is kept secret
Swept under the rug
If you never know truth
Then you never know love
Where's the love y'all? (I don't know)
Where's the truth y'all? (I don't know)
Where's the love y'all?

People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father father father help us
Send some guidance from above
Cause people got me got me questioning
Where is the love?(where is the lovex3)(the lovex2)

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder
As I'm getting older y'all people get colder
Most of us only care about money makin
Selfishness got us followin the wrong direction
Wrong information always shown by the media
Negative images is the main criteria
Infecting their young minds faster than bacteria
Kids wanna act like what the see in the cinema
Whatever happened to the values of humanity
Whatever happened to the fairness and equality
Instead of spreading love, we're spreading anomosity
Lack of understanding, leading us away from unity
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feeling under
That's the reason why sometimes I'm feeling down
It's no wonder why sometimes I'm feeling under
I gotta keep my faith alive, until love is found
People killing people dying
Children hurtin you hear them crying
Can you practice what you preach
Would you turn the other cheek?
Father Father Father help us

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Get to know yourself better

i was a bit bored and decided to try the quiz below from rose's to try whether anything interesting would come out. found out that it wasn't such a big fat cover-up after all, until i got it to this part "You like to flirt and behave seductively." me?!? a playfully, superficially flirt with danger of a kind? or perhaps the lightly casually flippantly type of flirty that never even been realised before?

me, a flirt! breakthrough#2.. (that doesn't even make sense to pair up with breakthrough#1..straighforward).

so, if anyone should have the slightest idea of how realiable this quiz is, this is a desperate plea for someone to let me know whether i truly am.

i mean, if it is, this should FREAK me out, YOU KNOW??

(and i dare promise you that i won't risk it all with that kind of attitude that yells out to 'Beat Joe-not-so-average! Destroy him! Conquer him with your sneaky manipulative charms and your spike-heeled boots and your 6-inch-thick whip! MAKE HIM BOW TO YOU AND BEG FOR MORE!!!' if it is..afterall ;)

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education:
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

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